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Eloping  ~vs~ The Big Wedding!    Our Story...

11/16/1987

 
​Why we Eloped..... 
​
Everyone has different reasons why they would Elope instead of having that Big Wedding! 
Here's our Story!  ( If your interested ) ~

I always wanted a BIG FANCY wedding.  One filled with flowers and beautiful dresses and all the fixings on the tables!
As a teenager I had stacks and stacks of Bridal magazines and I would fill out the freebie coupons and write away for all 
the Honeymoon destination getaway brochures, sample invitations and favors.  I pretended to be a Bride to be... just so
I could all the free samples.   I would then sit in my room and plan my big day.   I had everything in a big ole photo album... 

Table Decorations, Sample Invitations, Music scores, Catalog cutouts of Dresses, A heart shaped tub in the Poconos! 
Sounds Silly Huh?   Believe it or not I still have some of those "Buy a Dress from JCPennys" catalog cutouts in my safe!
We didn't have the internet back then, we had to do research about the Big Day by snail mail, and requesting
samples to be sent to us for picking and choosing.   

Wedding Day IDEAS?  You all have it so easy nowadays...  but we had to come up with them on our own...  

However, that big fancy wedding would never be in my future.... Don't feel bad for me... it happened just how we wanted!
I come from a single mom home and the hubby was away from his family as he was serving in the Navy.
So having that big fancy wedding I had always ​dreamed of was obviously not going to happen.   All my high school friends
were on the mainland and his family was too ~ so the only people we had locally to attend was my sister and her son, 
a few crew buddies from the Submarine he served on and my Mom and our Daughter who was 3.   Being on an
island in the middle of the ocean ( Oahu, Hawaii )  makes it a little bit more difficult to invite people to attend.   

As much as I wanted the dress and all the extras we just knew we could not afford it.   The money we would spend for only a 
handful to stand around for a few minutes and watch us say I DO was just too much for us to comprehend.   I started adding up how much it would cost for the Venue, Minister, Flowers, Dresses and Tux, Shoes, Food and even a Honeymoon....  
It became just too much ~ So we decided the best thing to do was just ELOPE!   We planned on having a big party later on when everyone could come together and celebrate us as one....  

We both thought that by eloping and having a party later on, would prevent anyone from spending what we all didn't have for a simple ceremony that we knew would grow eventually into a big shindig that would grow and grow even if we didn't have anyone to attend.   We really thought and knew eloping was best!!!   

Even though WE were Happy with our decision..... Our Family was NOT!    Boy did we get scolded.
What worked for US because we only needed each other... we know now --- We were WRONG...... 
In hind sight now, I wish we had done even the smallest of ceremonies...  Even if just for our family!   A small Regret!

Boy were his parents pissed off mainly because we didn't even give them a say to come or not.  To tell the truth he didn't
even tell his family we were even getting married until AFTER we already were...   He didn't want them to fly out to Hawaii and spend money they didn't have just to see us say ID...   

My mom was NOT happy at all.  She knew we were getting married and we had already picked out a dress for our daughter 
to be a flower girl and we were working on finding me a dress we could afford.  Flowers and even the Venue.  It was in the works...  However the main reason she was upset was even if we didn't have a ceremony for the few in town to attend... 
She was mad that we didn't take our daughter with us.  We thought she was too young to understand because she was only
3 years old...so we just let her stay with Nana for the day!     What we realize now is she was excited to wear her dress! 

Yeah we blew the pooch on that one...  Shame on us we should have taken her with us... We thought we were 
doing the right thing and preventing spending on things that really didn't matter...  It was really an Impulse - Let's Do It day!
Even though we weren't really thinking and were just acting on emotions at the moment.  We now know we made a mistake. 
We didn't allow his parents, our daughter and my mom the opportunity to join us if even downtown at the courthouse. 
In hind sight we missed out on the photo op too!   We don't have a wedding picture - I wish to do a DO OVER someday!

How did we really decide to just Elope?
Originally we had planned to make it a Christmas Eve event... It may not have been big and fancy but it was going to be a nice little ceremony by the ocean in a little white chapel on the Navy Base.    As time got closer and nothing had really been decided on as far as telling his family and splurging on all the dresses and flowers and trimmings... We realized it was not worth it to us to spend the money when it could go for so much more that we needed. 

One day while we were out together discussing the wedding - We just said screw it and went downtown to the courthouse.
We filled out the paperwork for a marriage license and walked across the street to the courthouse and got married... 

Looking back on it - we could have chosen to do things differently even without spending a lot of money but that's what we did and we can't go back and change it...   but if we could - we would... 

Our wedding was in a tiny little room with just the judge sitting behind his desk.   Nothing fancy at all about that... 
His secretary came in and was our witness...  He said a small little speech, We said I DO... and it was over.... 
We were MARRIED!     WOW... that was exciting.....    NOT!

It was nothing special, we didn't feel any different, in fact it felt just like another day.... 
But..... We loved each other and that was all that mattered.   We were Married!   To us it was just a piece of paper...
Do I regret it... Yes and No... Yes because I wanted all the trimmings since I was in Junior High...
But......I got the love of my life... so No!

Now we had to tell the family.... as you can imagine it didn't turn out all that sweet... I wished we could have had a family 
gathering even if just on the beach with a Ordained Minister and just who was there...  Taken some photos and partied. 
You know a DIY Wedding...  I'm not saying that Eloping is the right thing to do for you... vs Having the Big Wedding... 
It was for us...  I'm sharing MY STORY so you can see why we made the decision we did to Elope.   

Make the best decision for you!   If you want to Elope or just get hitched because it's just the two of you....   
Let me help you become one!   I can marry you here in the Dallas area... 

It doesn't matter if it's a small intimate affair or you go for the Big Shindig... 
I am a licensed Ordained Minister in the State of Texas.   All you need is your Marriage License.   Contact Me!

Having the small intimate affair and want to DIY?  Check out these ideas here - 

Need a License in Texas?  Check out the Clerk of Court in your area here - 

Ladies let us help you change your name on everything that's official...  Sneak a peek here -

No matter what.... CONGRATULATIONS on your decision to get hitched....  

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